To achieve success in any area of your life, you have to first determine exactly what ‘Success’ looks like to you. If you up against obstacles and challenges on your way you can be sure that you are in one of 7 states – energetic placements, if you like that once, amended will allow all of your energy to flow freely once again.
The 7 Words system is derived from Sufism and incorporates the full range of physical, mental and emotional states that we encompass as we travel along life’s highway. when we reach a blockage we will discover that one of those three areas is not flowing freely (our body is impaired; our mind is unfocussed or our spirit misaligned) and once we recognise this we can quickly and easily remedy our situation, unblocking the flow of life force within us and once again becoming the divine creators we truly are.
For this post I will use CONFIDENCE as a subject. If you are lacking in self confidence; doubt your abilities in a certain area or indeed have developed a sense of unworthiness in any area of your life, this example will give you some pointers.
Whenever you come up against an obstacle or find yourself in struggle, the very first thing to do is check in with yourself. Are you clearly maintaining your boundaries or are you letting others dictate your life to you? Oh so often you will need to go no further because 90% of our problems with regards to interacting with others, is down to unclear boundaries.
If your boundaries are firm, look to your identity; are you being congruent in all areas of your life or are you being so flexible that people are not quite sure exactly who you are?
Can you declare your boundaries and identity in less than 30 words in the comments?
If you are feeling less than confident in one area, are you exploring the range of opportunities which might be better suited to you (your boundaries and your identity)? Be willing to explore new avenues, methods and approaches to find the clarity and confidence you seek. If talking with your partner is difficult – attend couples therapy, for example; using a mediator can bring great clarity to confused situations. Being open to doing things differently may be the breakthrough you have been looking for.
Can you think of two alternatives that you could explore to get moving again?
I know only too well how soul destroying it is to spend hours every day in a job that you loathe, or in a relationship that feels all wrong. So looking at your core values and seeing where the mis-match is can often guide you back on track. If you value caring yet work in a ruthless environment – something needs to give, but just as easily, if you value challenge and adventure yet your partner refuses to leave the house – you have a decision to make: your core values are like gold dust to creating a life you love.
Can you share an example of when you realised your ‘life’ wasn’t matching your values? What did you do about it? And how did you feel afterwards?
What are you still holding onto that makes you feel like crap? Old memories? That inner voice telling you you are worthless? The school bully who ruined your graduation? Or maybe that most embarrassing moment when you got up to sing and everybody laughed? Whatever it is that you are holding onto – now is the time to let it go. Use a ceremony OR simply write down the things you want to release and burn it. Imagine yourself releasing balloons filled with this bad feeling – watch them fly away, taking your suffering with them.
Can you think of something you need to Let Go of in order to move forward with more clarity and confidence?
Where are you going? What do you want to achieve? Having a strong vision for your future is vital in enabling you to create it. after all, if you got into an Über and simply said ‘Take me somewhere’ you would be really surprised if you found yourself anywhere remotely useful, wouldn’t you? Only by having a clear goal in mind, and being specific about getting there will you achieve your aims. I often think of my life in terms of a Mission Statement, which, when all else fails, is there to guide me in the best direction for the moment. My current mission statement is ‘…’
What is your mission statement? What overarching direction is your life following?
This one is a doozy. If you are still looking for the ‘secret sauce’ to overcoming conflict and regaining your sense of inner confidence then Taking Responsibility is a key point. Simply put, if you continue to blame others, feel wronged and repeat the negative mantra of ‘There’s nothing I can do’ then you are only going to prolong your agony.
If you can look at the situation with honest eyes, however, and come to see where you played your part, maybe by projecting your core beliefs onto another or acting in a way that bought the situation on, you are then able to change your own behaviour and remedy the situation. Remember: The only person you have any power over is yourself; wherever you find yourself, if you ask the simple question: ‘What part of this is mine?’ you will quickly come to see your next step – you might not like it – but that’s neither here nor there. Taking Full and Absolute responsibility can only ever bring relief and healing to all involved.
Where can you actively take responsibility for a place in your life where you feel less than confident? What one thing could you change TODAY to begin your own healing?
If you have followed the steps above, you will now find yourself feeling clearer, happier and less stressed in at least one area of your life and the magic of this system is that once you apply it in one area, you will find you cannot stop.Slowly the ripples of a calm knowing will begin to spill over into other areas as you find yourself transformed from a ‘Stressed Eric’ into a ‘Zen Zoe’ almost imperceptibly.
For more information about the 7 words system or to access my 7 Words Coaching please go to RobertaLeeSmart.com.