The more i get into this Blogging business, the more I realise that folks spend a long time ‘Crafting’ their posts to suit their audience or to achieve some preset goal.
Let me tell you right now…I ain’t one of them! Never say ‘Never’, of course, but as it stands today, I write, I check, I press publish. And the rest is up to you.
So now that thats out of the way I shall tell you a little story. A story of a woman (me) who had a ‘ickle relapse’ over the weekend. A short visit back to the Pit Of Depression and a SHARP REMINDER of why I no longer inhabit that godforsaken place.
It was Ugly.
It was painful and sad and full of tears and confusion. Angry welts and scars covered my soul and I fell into the seemingly endless pit of dark dampness, never reaching the bottom. It was a rage-filled journey, which caused me to lash out, strike out, hurl hatred at the world and even dare to feel unworthy of living, myself.
But it passed. I let it pass. I let it go. I decided not to stay. I breathed, smiled, got on with the day (yesterday) and moved through it. Today, I feel good. And Today was good to me. Funny that?
It will serve you no purpose for me to illuminate you on Why I fell, or What made me angry.
I realise now, that simply retelling THAT STORY over again will only remind me of how much it hurt. So let us suffice to say that you need to know I got through it. That it is Possible to get over a depressive episode and there are ways of achieving it. THIS is the juicy stuff that I want to share with you. I hope that’s ok with you?
A few days ago I saw a post on LinkedIn regarding Equine Therapy and I instantly responded, referring a connection I made last year to the enquirer.
I met Martin Court ()http://uk.linkedin.com/in/martyncourt, a Sedona Method Practitioner in Cheltenham when invited to attend an introductory session for The Sedona Method. and discovered he was also a Cavalli Liberi (Natural Horsemanship) facilitator, who supported riders in their relationships with horses.
As I wrote the details of Martyn’s Work for my LinkedIn contact, I had a Huge’ AHA’ moment and immediately sent him an email expressing my desire for a meeting; still a little unclear as to WHY?
(Have you ever done that? Made a leap without fully understanding what you were aiming for? Feels amazing, right?)
I used to ride as a child, and have a lifelong love of horses. I have always had them as a feature of whatever ‘Dream Life’ I have pictured. You know, those dreams where you have the ideal house, with ALL the rooms you could ever want, well in my picture there was ALWAYS a couple of horses in a field next door. Such a fixture were they, that I think i almost forgot that they were there.
But what do horses have to do with my coaching practice or my personal healing? Good Question. thanks for asking.
I made the realisation years ago that the ‘peace’ we are all striving for in our adult lives, was, in fact, a natural state that I experienced whenever I was on or around horses. That telepathic link, the calm acceptance of the moment, no past no future, just an endless present. As a super-sensitive child, the horses and the countryside gave me so much pleasure, peace and confidence. I truly was ‘In my element’.
Now, I learned to ride in a very British Fashion. Where horses were ‘broken in’ and were to be ‘mastered’. (Forgive me, it WAS the 70’s)
In later years I discovered Monty Roberts and the concept of Horse Whispering. I read all about ‘Join- Up’ and felt like I was ‘coming home’. This made sense. This was how we talked to horses, and this was how we developed our relationships.
And This was how we could heal our souls.
I have been fantasising about becoming an Equine Therapist for ages but could not see how I could make it happen. Finances, Logistics, Confidence, (or Lack thereof), they all played a part. But this ‘AHA’ moment, this realisation has forced me to look my DREAMS right in the eye.
Yes! I want to help people. No! I don’t want to be a counsellor. Yes! I want to support individuals with their communications. No! I don’t want to build a business around other peoples pain. Yes! I want to work with horses. No! I’m not ready to own any right now.
So clarity ensues and a meeting this morning with Martyn reveals that all my obstacles are now obsolete. I have access to horses. I have access to Martyn and Sharron, and The Sedona Method AND I can begin to create a business in which I offer all my skills, my passions and my integrity, guaranteeing Great Results, and the future I truly desire for my family.
It has taken a while to find this depth of clarity. With so many questions of integrity; Am I good enough? Do I know enough? Can I guarantee ANYTHING? DO I REALLY want to do this?
And now I truly know. YES! I do.
I am ready to learn, heal , share and teach.
I am fully ready to step into my best self, and live THERE rather than merely catching glimpses of her from time to time. And I am ready to Step- Up and offer ALL I HAVE to clients who are ready to work with me.
It as taken years of hard work, study, personal pain and journeying to get to this point. And I sure as hell am ready to let it all go.
And in keepin with the theme of my last post The Lazy Girls Guide to Success, this work is almost effortless. It works because it uses natural energy, nothing more taxing than that. As a practitioner I simply have to ask the questions, as a client you simply have to choose. No pushing, no shoving, no pulling or yanking. (Just like a well-mannered horse, some might say?)
Yep, I now have a full arsenal of TOOLS in my Toolbox. To provide swift, joyous, effortless change and give you back the YOU you are longing for.
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Till Next Time