I had a rare girly night in, last night. My good friend, Coach and Therapist Sara Ackrill invited me to meet her at home and prepared the most delicious Moroccan Tagine for supper.
We both share a passion for Mental health matters, and as a Counsellor herself, we had quite an in depth discussion about our personal motivation for ‘helping’ people, and wanting to offer counselling and coaching.
Our top ten reasons for being Coach’s or Therapists came out as follows:
1. We understand that poor mental health stems from your human needs not being met: Not being heard or seen, not having freedom to make mistakes and learn, having no privacy, not being understood, all create the long-term, chronic illnesses we see around us every day, from Depression to Anxiety through Bi Polar to Suicidal tendencies.
2. We wish to add value to peoples lives. It seems to be the only kind of work which we can find Real Value in, after all what else really matters? Selling STUFF? Making MONEY? Really?
3. We understand the value of ‘Being Seen’, ‘Being Heard’ and Having a Voice’ Does this count a three reasons?) My personal motivation for ‘Seeing’ people, in all settings, from the old lady at the bus stop, to the mum with the screaming baby in the supermarket, is the knowledge of how painful it is to be ignored. To not be allowed a voice within the family, and to be overlooked unless I was ‘making someone happy’. I know I am not alone in these experiences, and however much the older generation wish to minimize and belittle these experiences, they are fundamental to the Healthy Mind of the growing child and the adult they will become.
4. This is the ‘Work we are Meant to Do’. It became so clear, during our conversations that we cannot do anything else. It is our hearts desire and our passion. And how many people can say that about their work? Not many, hence the need for our services. After all, I get MY JOY from supporting YOU in finding YOUR JOY. Think about it.How cool is that?
5. We both identify as having Mental Health Issues. We think this is true of most therapists, to a greater or lesser extent. After all, who is ‘Normal’? What is ‘Normal’? (That’s another post, don’t you think?)
6. We see the best in everyone. We feel we are both blessed with the gift of seeing the beauty within. Of seeing past the trauma, the label, the hard shell, and into the core of the person; The inner child. This is a skill I believe you are born with, not something you can learn in a course or seminar.
7. We have experienced mistreatment at the hands of others. Whether family trauma, bullying, segregation or physical attack. This makes our empathy ‘Experience Driven’, without our needing to project our own experiences onto the client, we can honestly say, we understand how they ‘might’ be feeling.
8. We both passionately believe that your self-worth is not dependent on your profitability. That your mental health does not preclude you from living a full life and everyone deserves the opportunity to access everything life offers, regardless of their ability to hold down a job or live in a socially acceptable way.
9. The field of Therapy is an ever changing landscape. One which requires an open mind, a ‘Lifelong Learning’ approach to developments, and which trusts the client to know him/herself best. We believe we hold the client in the highest esteem and want to ‘support’ a client in achieving their own goals, rather than facilitating the change ourselves. A quiet confidence blended with the utmost humility is a pre-requisite for our practice.
10. We are Bloody Good at what we do. We have taken a life time of learning and experience, and created answers to problems. We are Spiritual Alchemists, turning Lead into Gold. Taking Negativity and applying heat and pressure until it yields a Positive Result. Our practice uses, Love, Energy, Understanding and Non Judgement, along with tried and tested tools of coaches and therapists across the years to bring our clients the Very Best Results.
So as you can see, a girly night in can reveal the most deep and personal of details and forge lifelong connections. Sure beats watching Crap on TV and eating Pizza!